A Fly On the Wall: Trump & Pence

Partial transcript of Trump’s meeting with Vice President Pence in the Oval Office early on Wednesday, Jan. 6.

Trump: Mike, what’s your plan today? How long will this take? You are going to do the right thing, right?

Pence: Mr. President . . .

Trump: We’ve got to get this election back, Mike. This is ridiculous. It was stolen from us. Me and you. The lies, the machines, the ballot stuffing, the dead people. This was taken from us Mike, me and you, mostly me but we have to get it back. It’s up to you now . . .

Pence: Mr. President . . .

Trump: No, no, no, we’ve got a million people out there today who love us. We are loved. It’s a beautiful thing! They love our country, but they love me even more! Look at the flags they’re carrying. I’m Rambo! I’m their hero. There’s no way I lost this election. Look at all the people out there! If everyone of them voted right now, it would be at least 11,000 and 800, more than enough to overturn the Georgia vote. Wait, can we do that? Stephen (Stephen Miller, Trump’s butt boy), can we set up polling stations out on the mall, couldn’t they just vote today and we can use those votes to overturn Georgia, then do the same thing in . . .

Miller: Mr. President . . .

Trump: Just thinking out loud now, let’s just spitball this. Can’t we do re-elections in Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Arizona, Nevada and Georgia? On our own? Those people out there would help us do it. We’ll do it all by hand, we don’t need those machines from Venezuela. It will just be a recalculation. But it will give us fire. My base will love it. 48 hours? We could do it in 48 hours, right? Then I could announce the results at Mt. Rushmore. I loved that rally! With all those presidents looking over my shoulder. And the planes flying overhead. It was so beautiful! Wait, here’s my line, I’ll read out the votes — hundreds of thousands of votes for me — and then I’ll pause and say, “The American people have spoken, and they’ve said, ‘Mr. President . . . You’re hired!’” Get it? That’s beautiful. Stephen? What happened? Where did Stephen go?

Pence: He left Mr. President, he said he had to pick up his dry cleaning.

Trump: That’s OK, we’ll get Barr to spearhead this, he’s a pain in the ass, but I like his resting bitch face. People pay attention to him.

Pence: Mr. President, Bill resigned. He left the administration on Dec. 23.

Trump: Oh, right. What about Pompeo? Get the big guy in here.

Pence: No one’s seen the Secretary of State for the past two weeks, Mr. President. Mr. President, if I could, I’d like to . . .

Trump: OK, fine, Rudy can do it. I hated that Borat thing, it made him look stupid, laying there with his hands down his pants, but Rudy gets things done in a pinch. Jesus, he’ll do anything I ask him! Get Rudy in here! Wait, what are we talking about here? I had an idea, right? It was a good one. Our own vote, right? Who needs the Electoral College? What is that even? Do they have a building? Can we just go there and make our pitch? I did a pretty good job with that Raffleburger guy in Georgia, right? Not a lot of pushback there, I’m sure he’ll come out on the right side. Oh yeah, that’s what we were talking about! Mike, you’re going to do the right thing today, right? I can count on you right? I mean, I rescued you from a failing talk radio show, you were going nowhere. You owe me. What’s your plan? I think it would be great if you took the vote counts, the fake votes, and tore them up in front of Pelosi, the way she tore up my State of the Union speech.

Pence: Mr. President, this is a serious and somber day. As a country, we are at an inflection point . . .

Trump: Oh, inflect this Mike! This is the Alamo here! This covid thing is terrible. I know Xi launched it to bring me down, that son-of-a-bitch. Biden probably knew about it too, how else could he get elected? I mean, look at the size of that crowd out there (Trump turns to look out the window). God, they love me. You, probably not as much. But if you do the right thing today, they’ll love you. If you don’t, I’ll just tell them to march to the Capitol and open a can of whup-ass. These are my people, all fine Americans, patriots, many, many fine people, especially the guy that paints his face and wears the horns, he’s a riot, and those Proud Boys, they’re just like Rudy, but crazier and in better shape . . .

Pence: Mr. President, let me say one thing here. . .

Trump: Nothing for you to say, Mike, just . . .

Pence: No, Mr. President. There is something that needs to be said. Right now, as we sit here, you are single-handedly destroying your legacy, the reputation of the Republican Party, and the soul of this country. For several years, I’ve been proud to work with you and proud of what we’ve accomplished. The economy has been revived. The criminal justice system has been reformed. Peace is breaking out in the Middle East. We’re standing up to China. But right now, you are destroying all of that. You are making a mockery of the democratic process. You are enabling unhinged conspiracy nuts like Q Anon. You are creating an alternate reality and selling it to a gullible and agitated public. At this moment, you are the very antithesis of presidential leadership and you are — excuse my language, Mr. President — pissing on the history of our great democracy and its long and unblemished record of the peaceful transfer of power, which is a beacon to the world. This has to stop. I am walking down to the Capitol, I am going to take my seats in the House and the Senate, we are going to recognize and certify the votes of the Electoral College — which is not a building, by the way, for God’s sake — and Joe Biden and Kamala Harris will be sworn in on Jan. 20. This is America and the people have spoken.

(Trump, extremely agitated, starts yelling)

Trump: Ivanka! Ivanka! Don. Jr.! Get in here!

(Picks up phone)

Trump: Tell Madeline to come in here! What? I fired her? Oh yeah, those things she said about my daughter when she was drinking with the fake news media. OK, tell Mark (Meadows) to come in here! What? Covid, again? Fine, get Rudy in here . . .

Pence: Mr. President, I’m leaving . . .

Trump: . . . and then get the Supreme Court over here, I’ve got an idea, it’s beautiful.

(Transcript ends)

2 comments

  1. One would think this could never happen. You captured the conversation. The chaos and violence will be forever etched in our minds.

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